Ah, personality, this is my favorite section. I usually start from the shallow levels and work my way to the deeper workings and layers of the character’s mind. Also, try to make them different from you and what your behaviors are. Make them their own person and be sure to really use the history for this.

First Impressions
Pretty simple to start with and the most helpful thing you can give another RPer when writing with your character. What is usually the first impression your character gives to others in most normal situations? Polite but awkward? Quiet and shy? Quiet and cold? Loud and obnoxious? Apathetic and rude? What is your character like on the surface levels of socializing?

Under the Surface
Perhaps your character is not all that they seem at first. Maybe though they appear apathetic and cold it is really because they are shy and sensitive creatures. Though the Mary Sue thing to do is make them dark and mysterious and cold and unfeeling on the surface, but really they have a lot of angst and a painful past *cough*Rontu*cough*. Or modest and kind and always trying to help others, like Barbie.

Really, if you want to spice it up really, and make things less predictable. Maybe your character is two-faced. Kind, moral, charming, and sweet on the surface, but underneath they are really after their own self-interests and don’t care about how many people they have to use and hurt to get it.

This is the part where you really have to think deeply about all your character’s inner workings. This is where other characters start to really get to know your character past surface level impressions. Perhaps they have been through several adventures and horrors together by now. They should start knowing things that are truer and deeper about your character. Outline those things about them.

The Roots
This is where you explain the sources of your character’s behavior patterns, often from what they experienced in their past. Whether it was painful and traumatic, thus causing distrust in all people, or a positive experience in which gave them an entirely new and enlightened outlook on life. Really get to the core of what your character is about here.

Also, try to avoid black or white sort of characters. Not everyone is so clear cut that they’re either “good” or “bad” people. Explore the gray areas of humanity, but avoid Villain-Sue and Angsty-Sue.

Summarize and Conclude
Depending on how long it is, it might be good to summarize the key points of your character and end it with a nice conclusion about them. It might be important to remind the reader of the most important parts of the personality that they may have forgotten along the way. I usually like to mention key first impressions again as well.

Here’s an example of an awesome personality description:

Altamira in Cadenza Madrigal-Valentia wrote:

Personality: The gypsy comes across as prideful and reserved, quick-witted and sometimes coldly indifferent. She’s very independent, and has confidence in her actions and choices, but that confidence is mired with the distrust of others, for she’s well aware of the fact that they affect the world she’s in, and can change situations dramatically if they choose to help or hinder her pursuit of her goals. This leads her to often weigh the pros and cons of a decision or situation, rather than jumping impetuously in. Others often feel the need to be wary in her presence; with one of the brightest minds ever to have dived into the criminal world, and with the driving force of characteristic Rubatoian passion within her, it can almost never be known for certain if the woman will call you a friend or stab you in the chest. Her respect is hard-earned and doesn’t always soften the edge to her tough attitude—making it very difficult to understand how well she’ll take to you if you don’t know her well. Calmness and a thick-skin towards rudeness seem to have helped colleague Louis Fritz and others become friendly with her over time, even going so far as to become drinking buddies, sparring partners, and most important of all, dependable allies. Cadenza has been described by some as a “real rough-and-tumble character who can still mellow out at times”—she tries to adapt the best she can to situations, determining what would be the best approach to them just as she once considered the best way to approach a crime. Still, she is not without a temper that can lead her to punch out innocent Dome messengers and not without nerves that can make her react in ways that are less-than-beneficial in the long view. Being a teacher of the Dome, she has seen much and is surprised by little; she quickly seemed to grasp the concept of the Dome’s sentience and the idea of there being different worlds. In battle, Cadenza is a calm and calculating fighter, determined and resolute when victory is necessary or desired, and when survival is on the line. She’s fierce and relentless with her attacks, showing mercy only on the very young, the very old, or, due to her late husband Paris Valentia having been one, soldiers. She utterly despises all police and other law enforcers and isn’t terribly fond of most vampires.

Altamira manages to say a lot about her character in efficient but short phrasings. Thus, she is not very wordy to get her point across—unlike myself as you might have noticed already. She also starts with first impressions, moves deeper, and then summarizes and concludes.

It is also important to be consistent with their behaviors and try to avoid contradictory things. Like saying they’re this and “at times” they are that. “At times” is much too vague and then they could be “that” whenever the author feels like, thus making room for self-insertion and Mary Sueism. It makes it possible for the character to change to another character’s liking so that they can remain popular and liked by all characters. State what those “times” are exactly so that you can keep it consistent and avoid that issue. Don’t make a transparent character unintentionally for ego boosting via character.

Though, I think it could be interesting to have a character that actually does have issues with sense of self. So they change their traits to the liking of others around them because they are unafraid not being accepted by others. See? If done intentionally with self-control, these matters can be handled and made interesting. To give a character this kind of flaw is for them and not for getting attention from other characters.

Also consider that most people avoid talking about their issues if they don’t want to talk about it. Most of the time we don’t drop cryptic remarks about our dark and tragic pasts. People usually hide their darkness in the darkest corners of their minds and hope it goes away like a bad dream. That might be why these things are considered dark. The darkness is where you hide something you don’t want to see or acknowledge. So you wouldn’t drop cryptic attention needy remarks about something you don’t want to acknowledge. A good example of this would be my character: Khaz Serwen. Boy did I give that kid issues, but he doesn’t go around whining about it to anyone who’ll listen. He hides it under a charming smile.

Though I do think it would be awesome if someone made a character that was just so self-absorbed and attention needy that they make a drama show out of their past. Because, shockingly and sadly, some real people actually do that. What do you think reality TV shows and Jerry Springer is about?

Most importantly, be consistent and use clear terms to explain these character traits.

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Not all Mary Sue ideas are bad. In fact, if we didn’t have at least a little of them, characters could be very dull. They were first thought up because they were dramatic and perhaps interesting in the beginning, but after being over used and unrealistic, it got old fast. Sometimes these things can spice them up a bit, but only if the golden rule is followed, you add some of your own unique and creative ideas and twists, and you don’t over do it and have too many of them like:

"Mary Sue/Gary Stu accidentally killed their parents and the remains of their small ethnic group in a burst of uncontrolled of power that leaves them as the sole survivor, and then being kidnapped from the streets they roamed in desolation and prostituted by a brothel, thus being raped and physically beaten on a regular basis. And then escaping and being discovered by a master of some mystical martial art to be extremely talented. He takes them in and helps them to gain control over the awesome power that killed their parents and people, and are instantly amazing at this battle art with the aid of their mystical trinket or sword that was the last heirloom of their now dead family."

Too much. Don’t do it and don’t push it. If you’re new, start out with as little Mary Sue traits as possible. Mary Sue can get out of control if not handled with care, so get some experience under your belt before you handle anymore. As said before, some writers can make Mary Sue ideas tasteful but don’t assume you’re one of them. Some of you may not be new to the EH or writing at all, but still have problems with Mary Sue taking over your characters. Do the test on your characters to make sure it isn’t you.

Oh, and I would see Gohan-Uto Sensei for a good and intentional example of a Mary Sue.

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